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Twas the Night Before Christmas Joke

Here is a funny twist on the Twas the night before Christmas story:


‘Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house,
everyone felt shitty, even the mouse!

Dad at the whore house, Mom smoking grass,
and I just settled down for a nice piece of ass.

Then out on the lawn there rose such a clatter,
I sprang from my piece to see what was the matter.

He came down the chimney like a bat out of hell,
I knew right away that fat fucker fell.

He filled all the stockings with pretzels and beer,
and a big rubber dick for my brother the queer.

He rose up the chimney with one hell of a fart,
that son-of-a-bitch blew my chimney apart.

He swore and he cursed as he flew out of sight,
“Piss on you all and have one hell of a night.”


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